Medical exam - Shooting Sports Forum


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Old 07-04-2020, 17:56   #1
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Medical exam

Another one from okie...

My urologistís office called the other day and explained that my scheduled appointment would now be
done over the phone due to the coronavirus. One hour before the scheduled teleconference, I was instructed
(via email) to administer my own urine test. This was to avoid those lab tests and costly co-pays that your
doctor's tell you to get at Quest Diagnostics, and because they're shutdown too.
Simply go outside and pee in the front yard.

If ants gather: DIABETES.
If you pee on your feet: PROSTATE
If it smells like a barbecue: CHOLESTEROL
If your wrist hurts when you shake it: OSTEOARTHRITIS
If you return to your house with your penis outside your pants: ALZHEIMER'S

Youíre welcome !
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Old 07-07-2020, 10:11   #2
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If you yelp in pain, kidney stones! Never had them But I have seen it in action. Ouchie.
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Old 07-07-2020, 13:33   #3
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Don't forget to stick your finger up your butt and wiggle it around a bit! No prostate exam would be complete without!
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Old 07-08-2020, 00:46   #4
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Old Irish cure for small kidney stones.....works like a charm.
Drink 4 pints (1/2 gallon) of Guinness Draught Stout.
The one time I had problems I did this & an hour later pissed out 4 BB+ sized black stones....having been previously catheterized 2x I never felt them come out, just saw them & heard them hit the porcelan.
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Old 07-08-2020, 03:49   #5
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All that service and only a $300 co pay!!!! What a deal.

Thank you Obama for screwing the Country.

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